Apologies, the concept of them and do you accept them?

[Get Pissed]

After a quarrel with a buddy this weekend, it got me thinking about the concept of apologies. He did something that really angered me and we talked about it, but I don't think he fully understood where I was coming from. I don't want this thread to be a venting thread on my end or an ellaborate discussion of why I was mad at him, but instead, do you accept apologies?

I realize it does depend on the situation absolutely. But on Saturday morning when my friend apologized about Friday night, when he said "I'm sorry", I told him I accepted his apology, but I am still bitter about his obnoxiousness the night before.

So do all of you "accept" apologies because its polite and you were taught to? What if you don't accept an apology, what does that mean? For instance if someone says they are sorry and you don't want to accept it do you just not say anything after they apologize, or do you tell them bluntly, "no, I don't accept your apology". Furthermore, say you choose the latter option, what then? Awkward silence?

I just think the idea of an apology is strange. If you truly break down an apology it is a substanceless, arbitrary form of expression.

Personally, I think I almost 99% of the time accept apologies. I do this because I don't want to have beef with anyone and I want to put closure on something. But, also I might accept an apology, such as with my buddy mentioned above, even if I don't really forgive him at that exact moment because I know I WANT to forgive him and I'm certain that over time I WILL forgive him. I'm very good with lying to myself. If I repeat something over and over in my head I will soon believe it. With this said, I feel that I almost always accept apologies because despite my bitterness and not really wanting to accept the apology at the moment it is presented, I in fact do accept, in order to implant that seed and begin to trick my mind that they are forgiven and once that seed blossoms (over a week or so of constantly repeating to myself that they are forgiven) they do infact become forgiven because I forced myself to forgive them. Make sense?

Maybe its bad that I do this trickery to my mind, but I'm all about love and peace and there is too much hate and ugliness in this world. As Wallace Stevens said "the world is ugly and the people are sad". I don't want to believe that quote even though I see it everyday, so I fight this cynical view on the world by being as selfless and optomistic as possible.

I think I may have gone of topic or lost many people in this rant, but back to the original content of this thread. Apologies, has anyone else disected the idea of an apology like I just did? Do you accept them? I realize it depends on the situation. For those that don't, do you do it often and when you don't how does the other person react?

Lets discuss the strange idea of an apology...thoughts? (other than I'm crazy :D)

[Midnight Judges]

Have you ever known a grown man who refuses to apologize for anything no matter how wrong they were? I have. I don't get it. It doesn't make you any less of a man to admit if you were wrong, in fact quite the opposite. It is a lower level of self awareness according to some psychologists.

I will not accept an apology if I think the person would do it again given the chance. It all boils down to intent.

If I really hated somebody I would tell them I accept their apology and then screw them over when the opportunity presents itself. :evil:

[SkinsOrlando]

I only false apologize like "oops I didn't mean to get it in your hair".

[One Shot]

I tend to be a forgiving person, especially if it's someone I care for.....sometimes good, sometimes not. But to not accept is, to me, like closing the door, and I don't agree with that. Then again, depends on what was done.