WWL: Local pastor charged with masturbating in park

[China]

Local pastor charged with masturbating in park (http://www.wwl.com/pages/9298567.php)

The Jefferson Parish Sheriff's Office confirms that deputies arrested 53-year-old Grant Storms on a charge of obscenity, after two witnesses told cops they saw Storms masturbating in a van at Lafreniere Park.

JPSO officials confirm that Storms is the same pastor who frequents the French Quarter to publicly rail against what he perceives as sinful behavior, such as the annual Decadence Festival.

Storms has been a primary voice of opposition to "Decadence Fest," an event that draws tens of thousands of gays and lesbians to the city for a weekend-long party in the Quarter.

Police say two women told park workers they saw Storms masturbating inside a van in the park near the carousel.

Sheriff spokesman Sgt. Larry Dyess told WWL First News that Storms origianlly told responding officers that he was tired from cutting grass and was urinating into a bottle inside of his van.

However, Dyess says that in further interviews with detectives, Storms admitted to masturbating inside the van.

Although Storms' van was parked in close proximity to the carosel and children's playground, Dyess could not confirm if Storms was watching children during the alleged incident.

Click on the link for the full article

[DaveMason]

Stories like these make me so mad.

...I mean, why can't we masturbate in our vans? Nobody's going to see unless they consciously look through the van's window. It's not like the guy is sitting on a park bench with no pants on. When will the public finally stand up in support of this behavior?

[Bang]

Ah yes,, more bull**** from the morally superior.

I bet if they have their big gay festival in the park, you won't find anyone masturbating in their van near the playground.

~Bang

[d0ublestr0ker0ll]

I'll go ahead and post the collective :puke: for everyone who reads this.

[mojo]

adorable....simply adorable

[ConnSKINS26]

Not surprised.

[visionary]

For some reason this incident seems to me like it might be some sort of set up.
On the other hand, the last line creeps me out....


Although Storms' van was parked in close proximity to the carosel and children's playground, Dyess could not confirm if Storms was watching children during the alleged incident.

[Forehead]

Stories like these make me so mad.

...I mean, why can't we masturbate in our vans? Nobody's going to see unless they consciously look through the van's window. It's not like the guy is sitting on a park bench with no pants on. When will the public finally stand up in support of this behavior?

How do you stay awake on long drives down the Interstate?:paranoid:

[Tulane Skins Fan]

How do you stay awake on long drives down the Interstate?:paranoid:

That usually puts me to sleep. :paranoid:

[Thiebear]

Notice how quiet it got around here once AS... er I mean that pastor got picked up.

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

There's this guy I work with that I'm almostt positive is a compulsive masterbator. First off, management was bitching about him using the bathroom 1-2 times an hour. I joked att the time that he was probably jacking off. Then about a week later, this kid coworker comes up to me all quiet and ashen faced and tells me that he thinks he just saw guy jerking off in his car. He wasn't involved in the previous discussion. two or three weeks after that, I randomly meet some guy who grew up with dude. He starts sharing stories with me (dude is just a weird guy anyway.) The biggest bombshell? He was caught repeatedly in high school jerking off. I mean come on.

[AsburySkinsFan]

Notice how quiet it got around here once AS... er I mean that pastor got picked up.

I don't masturbate in parks......:paranoid:

On another note, one thing that I've found is that people often speak most harshly against that which they struggle with the most.

[The Brave Little Toaster Oven]

There's this guy I work with that I'm almostt positive is a compulsive masterbator. First off, management was bitching about him using the bathroom 1-2 times an hour. I joked att the time that he was probably jacking off. Then about a week later, this kid coworker comes up to me all quiet and ashen faced and tells me that he thinks he just saw guy jerking off in his car. He wasn't involved in the previous discussion. two or three weeks after that, I randomly meet some guy who grew up with dude. He starts sharing stories with me (dude is just a weird guy anyway.) The biggest bombshell? He was caught repeatedly in high school jerking off. I mean come on.

....this guy delivers pizzas? :puke:

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

....this guy delivers pizzas? :puke:

Yup. Good thing we don't sell yogurt. There are the ranch cups though....

[The Brave Little Toaster Oven]

Yup. Good thing we don't sell yogurt. There are the ranch cups though....

is he a fat asian dude? I had some creepy asian dude deliver me a pizza 230am 2 weeks ago in Ballston...he looks like he'd jizz on your pizza and tell you its parmesan

[grego]

Ah yes,, more bull**** from the morally superior.

I bet if they have their big gay festival in the park, you won't find anyone masturbating in their van near the playground.

~Bang

but too many people use that as a reason to dismiss a religion, or god altogether. not that you do. but it happens. people are fallible, and this guy was clearly wrong, and disturbed.

probably why i dont put much faith in my fellow man.

[Mr. Sinister]

I can't think of a more awkward scenario than to somehow stumble upon a man, pastor not, beating his meat in a Chevy Astro, in a park.

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

is he a fat asian dude? I had some creepy asian dude deliver me a pizza 230am 2 weeks ago in Ballston...he looks like he'd jizz on your pizza and tell you its parmesan

Na, white guy. And its no where near Ballston. He's not the type to **** with your food either. He's actually a pretty nice guy. He just has issues. I always act like I'm in a bad mood when he's around so he doesn't try to talk to me. He just makes people uncomfortable when he binteracts with them. One of those type persons.

[d0ublestr0ker0ll]

The convo between GALCOB and BLTO reminds me of this scene (starts at 1:15):

LqpGiwNtMvY

[Destino]

I can't think of a more awkward scenario than to somehow stumble upon a man, pastor not, beating his meat in a Chevy Astro, in a park.

That comment made me laugh. Good point. It's one of those "ahh geez" moments you just wish you hadn't noticed.

[chipwhich]

On another note, one thing that I've found is that people often speak most harshly against that which they struggle with the most.


You mean signs of potential pedophilia when it occurs with law enforcement, pastors, people that the public generally trusts?

Yeah they speak most harshly against that. And it's not because any kind of struggle.

[LaRonDontLikeUgly]

Times have really changed and people are so uptight. My parents never would have met each other if they both hadn't been masterbating in the park at the same time.

[mboyd784]

is he a fat asian dude? I had some creepy asian dude deliver me a pizza 230am 2 weeks ago in Ballston...he looks like he'd jizz on your pizza and tell you its parmesan

Navy Dave.

[RansomthePasserby]

Navy Dave.

Huh, for some reason I never imagined Navy Dave as an Asian dude.

[AsburySkinsFan]

You mean signs of potential pedophilia when it occurs with law enforcement, pastors, people that the public generally trusts?

Yeah they speak most harshly against that. And it's not because any kind of struggle.

No, that's not what I mean, and putting those words in my mouth won't make it what I mean. What I mean is look at the things that someone opposes the most, and strongest, and that can be an indication of the things that they struggle with the most.

What I didn't say is "anything someone opposes they struggle with" that would be absurd, and instead of asking a question about my comment you decided that you already knew what I meant. :thumbsup:

[chipwhich]

What I mean is look at the things that someone opposes the most, and strongest, and that can be an indication of the things that they struggle with the most.


:ols: Wow I totally misread that earlier response. So what you were really admitting to was your own struggles ;)

[AsburySkinsFan]

:ols: Wow I totally misread that earlier response. So what you were really admitting to was your own struggles ;)

No, I just said I didn't masturbate in parks. If my actions were following my logic then I would have gone on long tirades about the immorality of masturbation, and I probably have started a thread on the subject, anything to cast the light of examination away from myself. ;)

[Kosher Ham]

Sounds like GACOLB's co-worker was already utilizing the lavatory. Poor guy had no choice.


Please don't make this religious, it's just another disgusting human being, religion really has nothing to do with it besides make it more interesting. Simply another sick individual with some of those shoes.

[Westbrook36]

Let those among us who have never masturbated in a park be the first to cast a stone.

/Leaves thread.

[China]

I can't think of a more awkward scenario than to somehow stumble upon a man, pastor not, beating his meat in a Chevy Astro, in a park.

Yeah, 'cause it wouldn't have been nearly as awkward if it had been a Ford Econoline.

[Kosher Ham]

Wait, I thought it was a Honda ?

[dockeryfan]

He working his own parks tour. Starting with local parks and working his way up to the National ones.

[Switchgear]

he looks like he'd jizz on your pizza and tell you its parmesan

I think this just might replace "Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining".

[grantarchy]

Apparently this pastor is quite the hypocrite, too:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/susan-deilyswearingen/raiding-the-closet_b_830074.html

[stevenaa]

I've seen some pretty hot women in parks. Not that I'd do that in a van... I don't own one. :)

[China]

Where else are you going to do it when you live in a van...down by the river!

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/1/16696/1431467-matt_foley_in_a_van_down_by_the_river_super.jpg

[mistertim]

I wonder if the van in question was this one:

http://www.fugly.com/media/IMAGES/Funny/free_candy_van.jpg

[headexplode]

He working his own parks tour. Starting with local parks and working his way up to the National ones.

He is going to be featured in Ken Burns' new film: "Masturbating in America's National Parks."