In a shocking consensus, peoples of the entire planet for the first time in history, have come to 100% agreement that the Washington Redskins football team are headed for total and utter destruction at the hands of the Seattle Seahawks.
Leaders from around the globe weighed in on the outcome of the impending battle. "We would like to caution our Washington friends, that the Seahawks will not simply surrender. These are seasoned fighters, and to assume they will run away at the mere appearance of Redskins is at best premature, and at worst dangerous", French president Jacque Chirac told reporters.
"They ahh being misled by a coach that lied. Foah this coach to send those brave playahs into hahms way is totally irresponsible, reprehensible, and wrong. Any reasonable person knows the quagmiah they ahh headed foah", said Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy outside a Boston pub.
Several other critics of the current team administration raised further concerns:
Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi blasted Redskin coach Joe Gibbs for what she called, "A total disregard for the safety of his players in deciding to send them into the game without sufficient body padding"
Senator Joe Biden accused the team owner of "shameful grandstanding", and "blatant, commercially motivated appearances" in front of WE SUPPORT THE REDSKINS banners.
"The fact that because some of us disagree with the coach about the team's chances, somehow that makes us disloyal fans"
Even the animal rights group PETA filed suit against the organization for deciding to go ahead with the battle against the Seahawks.
A representative of the organization announced the legal action would be dropped only after being informed that the Seahawks were not actually birds.
"When we set our minds to something, we can do it", responded coach Gibbs. "I realize a lot of people don't agree, but we've been misunderestimated in the past, and I believe the doubters will be proved wrong again"
A last minute appeal to the team management went on deaf ears, and the assault is on schedule for this coming Saturday. - API