Let's play the fill-in-the-blank game. Albert Haynesworth will pass his conditioning test before [blank]? Fill in with the absurdity of your choosing. Before . . . Brett Favre announces his next comeback? The midterm elections? The Iraqi drawdown is completed? Malia Obama plays in the WNBA?
Haynesworth continues to be the man of the hour at Redskins Park, or rather, the man of every minute of every hour, his condition so compulsively updated, tweeted and blogged that we know the exact length of his bathroom break. His fitness test has become such a serialized comedy-drama that if you want to find out what happens next, as Coach Mike Shanahan says, "You'll just have to stick around." On Day 6 of the Conditioning Watch, Haynesworth idled through yet another training camp session, nursing his knee instead of running his sprints. He watched from the sideline with a helmet on his head, set apart like a kid sent to the Manners Chair. After the session ended, he was escorted away by Redskins media executive Zack Bolno, who warded off all questions, presumably part of the isolation punishment.
"How's the knee?" someone asked as Haynesworth trudged past.
"Ask Zack," Haynesworth replied.
Let's be clear:
Haynesworth's knee is an issue, but it's not the real issue. Is it hurt to the point that it requires an MRI exam? "No," Shanahan said, "It's not." Could Shanahan let Haynesworth practice without passing the test? Sure. Will he? Certainly not. What's really going on here, the real show, is an attempt by Shanahan to subdue a 300-pound prima donna, and reduce him to wordless obedience.