The Royal Wedding: Why???

[Teller]

OK, seriously. Can someone please explain to me why I should give two flying ****s about Prince Billy Bob's wedding? (I forget which one he is. Andrew? Of Persia? Albert in a Can?) Seriously. Why do we care about these people at all????

Isn't the royal family, afterall, like American racism on steroids? I mean, we only discriminated against a few million people because of their skin color. These ****ers think they're better than everyone else in the entire damned country because of the FAMILY they were born into!!! BORN into!!! No work. No effort. No conquering hero. Make it through the birth canal, and BOOM. You're a prince.

There's no equivalent here. There's no, boom, you're an astronaut. Or boom, your a Playboy playmate. Or boom, you're the first Kenyan to rule....errrr....lead the United States. No. We pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and EARN what we get. Isn't that right, Bernie Madoff?!

And don't even get me started on the fact that we Americans came here to get AWAY from these douchewaggers. If you watch even a SECOND of that wedding, you are urinating on the graves of all those brave men who died fighting the world's only super power so that we could HAVE a country.

And don't give me that, "Oh, it's about the fairytale stories of princes and princesses." Seriously? Y'all don't get the Disney Channel? Call your cable provider, pony up the cash, and prince and princess yourself to damn death!

Ewwwhhh but hawg, youwah disrespecteeeeng the Queen mum! A mum is a flower, not a person. It's "mom," mmkay? A "flat" isn't a residence, it's bad a commute. "Getting sacked" isn't a bad thing; it's good damn Friday night. And "bobby?" Well, yeah, we'll let you have that one, because it's a ghey-azz name for a cop anyway. "Cop" is far better. Cop, from "copper," which is what the Irish (one of the many groups of people who are better than you) made their badges out of. Look it up!

Ewwwhhh but hawg, the King's English is the standard by which all English speakers should be measured. Yeah, that was until we whipped your ass and reversed super-power roles (in a scant century-and-a-half, mind you.) Welcome to the President's English. Ya feel me? No? Lemme break it down for ya one time....The victor writes the history books AND the damn dictionary.

So yeah, royal family, all you dirty rotten commoners, and everyone here who sympathizes with our former enemy. We've got the real "Big Ben." We speak real English. We are real. We earn our keep. And each of us is PROUD to have been born into the family that we were, in the greatest country on earth.

And if you don't like that, you can kiss my Londonderriere.

[Kosher Ham]

Long ass post just to say that it is stupid. I don't think most of the US cares.

[thebluefood]

I really do think that some in this country still wish we were ruled over a Monarch. I guess it's because they make all the decisions for the people and the people, in turn, don't have to vote or really think.

I don't know what it is. I think it's pretty disgusting, personally. I value the relationship we have with Great Britain, but we're not a colony anymore. I really don't give a damn about this wedding.

[Teller]

Long ass post to to say that it is stupid. I don't think most of the US cares.

But the libs around here told me, we drive the news. Not the other way around. Why does Brian Williams feel compelled to lead with this crap every night? Obviously SOMEONE wants to see it. (And don't you dare even say that's why I watch the Nightly News, or you'll be on the ES disabled list with three broken fingers. Go ahead, try to reach that "Q" with your left pinky taped to your ring finger.)

They also told me, that if anyone has any semblance of respect for former US enemies, like the South, they should be taken to Ruth's Chris and burned like a steak.

It's blindingly obvious. This wedding is a threat to EVERYTHING that we hold dear!!!!

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

Most people have boring, miserable lives and it's a nice, fairy tale-ish distraction.

[Toe Jam]

Correction: Obama was born in Hawaii, not Kenya.

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

British Royal family to us damn "libs" in three posts. Impressive.

[Teller]

Most people have boring, miserable lives and it's a nice, fairy tale-ish distraction.

At least we make our own boring, miserable lives. If I choose not to be a prince today, I don't have to. If Mick decides not to be a queen....well....OK, you make a point.

[fullnelson9999]

I don't think it's really that big of a deal, but let's not act like it's only in the UK that you can be born into money and high social status. We have that here too.

And don't even get me started on the fact that we Americans came here to get AWAY from these douchewaggers. If you watch even a SECOND of that wedding, you are urinating on the graves of all those brave men who died fighting the world's only super power so that we could HAVE a country.

I think that's WAY over the top.

[Teller]

Correction: Obama was born in Hawaii, not Kenya.

Prove it.

---------- Post added April-18th-2011 at 01:01 AM ----------

I think that's WAY over the top.

Never fear! is here!

[fullnelson9999]

Never fear! is here!

I get what you were doing, I just thought to bring that up was a little over the top for satire.

[Teller]

British Royal family to us damn "libs" in three posts. Impressive.

Seriously, y'all can't see that this is in jest? Am I really THAT good?

---------- Post added April-18th-2011 at 01:06 AM ----------

I get what you were doing, I just thought to bring that up was a little over the top for satire.

Fair enough.

[Park City Skins]

Oh now c'mon. Plenty of reasons to care about this wedding. For one there's the fact that they........
Okay see they're.........
Well there is.........






*





Okay. i got nuthin'.

[Bibby]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKqP-SnobQA[YOUTUBE][/YOUTUBE]

[STBonecrusher21]

His wife's hot?