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Thread: HIJACKING SOLUTION

  1. April-2nd-2002 06:47 PM #1
    Pete
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    HIJACKING SOLUTION

    HIJACKING SOLUTION <br />Federal Aviation Agency <br />800 Independence Avenue S.W. <br />Washington D.C. 20591 <br /><br />Dear Sirs: <br />I have the solution for the prevention of hijackings, and at the same time <br />getting our airline industry back on its feet. <br /><br />Since men of the Muslim religion are not allowed to look at naked women we should replace all of our female flight attendants with strippers. Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing a naked woman, and of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again in hope of seeing a naked woman. <br /><br />We would have no more hijackings, and the airline industry would have record sales. <br /><br />Now why didn't Congress think of this? Sincerely, Bill Clinton


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  2. April-2nd-2002 07:56 PM #2
    Mickalino
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    Sorry Pete, this wouldnt have worked. During the days and weeks before the 9/11 attacks, researchers have traced the actions of the hijackers which revealed that they went on spendng sprees at strip joints and gambling casinos, which has been thoroughly documented. This revelation has caused a stir since the very Arabs who attacked us because they consider us evil, immoral, and materialistic, were partaking of the very things they accused us of. This information was used as propaganda in many Arab countries to gain support for our battle against terrorism. The idea was to portray these people as hypocrites - basically saying 'how can you support such people ? They may be willing to die for their religion, yet they cannot even keep from committing the most elementary of sins. Their martyrdom is just a coverup for their true hypocritical ways.'<br /> <br /> <small>[ April 03, 2002, 01:58 AM: Message edited by: Mick ]</small>
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  3. April-2nd-2002 11:52 PM #3
    Glenn X
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    Yeah, but you gotta admit, Mick, it's a pretty damn good idea by Pete nonetheless. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="smile.gif" />
    "Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue." -- Barry Goldwater
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  4. April-3rd-2002 12:07 AM #4
    Brave
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    I agree. I'd probably fly more.<br /><br />And no one would complain about the food (or lack thereof.) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="smile.gif" />
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  5. April-3rd-2002 02:02 AM #5
    Art
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    There'a a problem with this solution. The bathrooms aren't nearly large enough for this type of inspiration, don't you think?
    If the ESFP has not developed their Thinking side by giving consideration to rational thought processing, they tend to become over-indulgent, and place more importance on immediate sensation and gratification than on their duties and obligations. They may also avoid looking at long-term consequences of their actions.
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  6. April-3rd-2002 05:04 AM #6
    Utah
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    Brings a whole new meaning to the word "cockpit"<br /><br /> <img border="0" alt="[doh]" title="" src="graemlins/doh.gif" />
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  7. April-3rd-2002 06:07 AM #7
    Park City Skins
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    <img border="0" alt="[doh]" title="" src="graemlins/doh.gif" /> Well, if the bathrooms are too small, there could be room for expansion. Either that or maybe some further improvement in First Class could be done. You know, services provided, extra seat room, ect.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="smile.gif" />


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  8. April-3rd-2002 04:53 PM #8
    Pete
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    Sorry, but I can't take credit for this one Glenn X. A friend sent me this one.


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  9. April-3rd-2002 05:26 PM #9
    Montilar
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    One other potential problem. It all depends on the woman or women. There are certain women shall we say that would drive me and many others to monkhood or the human race to extinction before the partaking of "intimate relationships with said women" ....<br /><br />Of course, I imagine most airline stewardess' would NOT fit into such a catagory. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="smile.gif" />
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  10. April-4th-2002 01:14 AM #10
    Glenn X
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    Montilar, would this be to your liking?<br /><br /> <img src="http://suze.net/preview/images/lexusshrine.jpg" alt="" />
    "Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue." -- Barry Goldwater
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  11. April-4th-2002 03:11 PM #11
    Riggo-toni
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    Come to butthead...

    "It is our true policy to steer clear of entangling alliances with any portion of the foreign world. The great rule of conduct for us in regard to foreign nations is, in extending our commercial relations, to have with them as little political connection as possible." George Washington.
    "Peace, commerce and honest friendship with all nations,entangling alliances with none." Thomas Jefferson.
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  12. April-4th-2002 03:15 PM #12
    Riggo-toni
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    On a slightly more serious note, the Brits used to deal with Muslim insurrectionists by burying them with pigs. Many of them believed that because the pigs were unclean animals, being buried with them would prevent their souls from entering paradise.<br /><br />Also, the Quran prohibits Muslims from using fire to kill their enemies, because only Allah is allowed to punish the Infidels with eternal flames. So, all these wackos involved in 9/11 went against the boundaries of their own religion.

    "It is our true policy to steer clear of entangling alliances with any portion of the foreign world. The great rule of conduct for us in regard to foreign nations is, in extending our commercial relations, to have with them as little political connection as possible." George Washington.
    "Peace, commerce and honest friendship with all nations,entangling alliances with none." Thomas Jefferson.
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  13. April-4th-2002 03:22 PM #13
    Montilar
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    Oh YEA! Very Very much to my liking. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="biggrin.gif" />
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  14. April-4th-2002 06:35 PM #14
    Park City Skins
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    Burying with pigs? <img border="0" alt="[puke]" title="" src="graemlins/pukeface.gif" /> That'll learn 'em. As for the flames, well, apparently these ***holes were not only "misguided" and not "true followers", they apparently didn't keep up on there reading. <img border="0" alt="[doh]" title="" src="graemlins/doh.gif" /> Glenn X. To quote a certain....hero that I used to read alot of some years ago; " Oh my stars and garters"!


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  15. April-5th-2002 05:31 AM #15
    GrapeApe
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    All of the silicon would weigh down the plane too much to be feasible. The weight/lift and thrust/drag ratios would be too high and cause too much fuel to be expended.
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